17 March 2006

Bottom-less keg?

If you’re going out drinking for St. Patty’s: One hour -One beer + one set of car keys = possibility of lifetime use of wheelchair or coffin.

Yup, it CAN happen. Find a safe place to land before getting sloshed and before it’s not easy to use reason. Hand your Auto Club card to the bartender, to get you and car towed home –or tuck cash into envelope, to use on a cab –choose who will be beer-free and watchdog for the evening. Stuff your tummy with bread, heavily coated with butter before drinking; don’t drink till stupid.

If you aren’t 21 yet: you aren’t legal to drink –for good reasons. Your skull hasn’t hardened; alcohol –even one beer binge, ‘tags’ markers in your brain –permanently. You could cause yourself addiction to booze without even realizing it or wanting to. If you aren’t 21 Don’t drink Don’t drink.

Legal age or not, if you’re so unhappy you want to get drunk: when you sober up you’ll still have same issues –plus a sore head. Turn your face to whatever is making you unhappy, it’s not at the bottom of a glass.

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